OakMonster’s Den

Brandon’s back.

That is all.

Aurora just left. James has D&D night and Brandon’s out, so us girls escaped to do something very girlie.

We had garlicky and cheesy pizza and wine and watched Dreamgirls and that clip of Jake Gyllenhaal’s SNL intro and we chat about stuff. Next thing we know, it was 10 p.m.

Oh, and my god that Jennifer Hudson! What a voice! Good lawd! Seriously! She’s just AWESOME in this movie, totally deserves an Oscar. “Listen” is my favorite song.

Anyways. After Aurora left, I came here to finish my daily blog reading. On Thai-Blogs a few days ago, Steve Suphan ranted about the state of Buddhism in Thailand. Bhikkhu Pesala, a Buddhist monk from Essex, UK, stopped by to give some real answers. I figured I posted the burning question I never asked a monk before. And to my surprise, he came by to answer. (Serious Dhamma discussion over here, y’all. Feel free to skip the seriousness to the point of this post.)

OakMonster: Well, just in case Bhikkhu Pesala stopped by again, I would like to ask the big question. I was raised a Buddhist. I still consider myself one even though in the not strictest of sense. I believe in Buddha’s path to nirvana. I’m doing the best I can to “be good” and keeping things in balance. But there are things that bother me about Thailand’s Buddhism as I grow up.

With all the rules for women to follow at the temple, I felt alienated and uncomfortable. I’ve grown up to be scared of the temple, afraid to do the wrong thing or act improperly. And as I’ve grown up enough to question things, I did have an issue. I don’t like the fact that women don’t have equal footing in the religion. What do you mean, only a man can achieve nirvana?

I don’t like that at one point I was told that women are the “enemies of the religion because they are tempters” and yet we are expected to go to the temples in droves.

I don’t know if it’s just Thailand’s Buddhism or it’s across the board. Doesn’t India allow female monks? Am I going to hell for questioning the religion? And even with all of my questionings, if I follow the words of Buddha without ever setting foot in the temple again, does that make me less of a Buddhist?

I’m sorry. I had to ask. I would never dare to ask this question to a monk in Thailand. I’d get chased out of the temple, I should think.

Bhikkhu Pesala: Some monks are sexually repressed and so feel uncomfortable around women. They are the one’s who are sexist and treat women unjustly. Those who practise properly are comfortable with women, though they are still cautious and may seem rather aloof. It is harmful for all when monks and ladies become too intimate and friendly, therefore the Buddha laid down some rules such as not talking alone with women, not arranging to travel with woman, not touching women, etc.

It is difficult - on the one hand we wish to practise metta [kindness, goodwill, friendliness] but on the other hand metta easily turns to affection and lust.

There is no text that says women cannot attain nibbana [”nirvana”, end of suffering]. Judging from my observations in Burma, women are perhaps more likely to attain nibbana than men. Why do I say that? They seem to have better morality, they are more obedient, and they have more faith (saddha) in the Buddha’s teachings.

I might be totally wrong of course. Without the Buddha’s powers no one can tell who has attained nibbana or not; who is getting close to nibbana and who is still very far away from attaining it.

The Buddha did teach that it is impossible that a woman could be a Fully Enlightened Sammasambuddha. He did not teach that women could not attain the highest goal of Arahantship in this very life. It is no harder for woman than it is for men. Since women have to overcome a lot of prejudice, perhaps they will try a lot harder than men. To attain nibbana certainly requires courageous effort and keen wisdom.

The Buddha did permit the ordination of women as Bhikkhunis during his life. However, the Theravada lineage of the Bhikkhuni Sangha has died out and cannot be revived. That is the orthodox view in Thailand and Burma. In Sri Lanka, the monks have revived the Bhikkhuni Sasana from a Mahayana lineage. I believe that Thai and Burmese Sanghas are strongly opposed to Bhikkhuni ordination.

It would be better to travel to Burma or seek out tolerant monks in Thailand to practice with. My own meditation teacher, Chanmyay Sayadaw U Janaka has a centre in Thailand and travels there sometimes. His meditation centre in Rangoon is full of Buddhist thilashins (nuns), and women who practise meditation intensively with a view to realising nibbana in this very life.

P.S. The one’s who are going to hell are the one’s who don’t question the religion. The Buddha was clear that one should make a thorough investigation and ask questions. See the Kalama Sutta. Asking pertinent questions leads to being intelligent.

The only thing is to avoid fault-finding and skepticism that would prevent one from actually practising the religion.

Who knew I could break into a serious religious talk! But I got some answers for the first time. And that’s a good thing to be able to have a conversation with a monk without feeling uneasy about it. Just to start a religious conversation alone is already odd for me. Yet, it makes me feel like I’m one step closer to my mom who is quite religious.

Oh, and as I was finishing up reading the comment from the Bhikkhu, Jewel on the randomized MP3 player sang:

It’s gonna be all right, no matter what they say
It’s gonna be a good day, just wait and see
It’s gonna be alright, cause I’m alright with me
It’s gonna be, it’s gonna be, it’s gotta be [okay]

It’s gonna be all right.

Now I really know.

Night One without Brandon?  Totally sucks.

I stayed up as late as I could to get sleepy enough to sleep through the night.  Of course, the F-Bombers next door would decide to have late drinking night.  Fortunately, they weren’t loud but the made enough noise to startle me at 1:30 a.m.  I kept waking up here and there after that.

*sigh*

The 2007 fundraising campaign for June 23 AIDS Walk Long Beach has begun.

Y’all go over there and help us out, okay?

Blame this on Kuri (oh and he has a LOT more!)

NIN + Spock/Kirk love connection.  How could you pass this up?

It’s here.

Brandon leaves for DC on Sunday. This will be the first time I sleep in OUR bed alone. It’ll only be a few days, But you betcha I’ll bring the katana into the bedroom and be barring my door with chairs.

Well, you just don’t know when zombies would decide to have an uprising.

I am usually a heavy sleeper but if I have a twinge of paranoia either from a bad dream or a scary movie I watched before bed, I’d be on pins and needles all night. I apologize in advance for my temporary insanity next week.

We have been preparing for his trip these past few days. Mainly, we have to improve his wardrobe. He can’t get away with just polo shirts so we picked up a few button-downs.

Also we finally bought a camera bag for our newly beloved SLR, so the kid will travel safely.

Yep. I’m calling our camera the Kid. I haven’t named it yet, but it’s like my baby at the moment so I’m resolved to call it the Kid for now.

Anyways. I hope Brandon will have enough free time to take the Kid out for a spin in the nation’s capital.

In addition to the trip, I have events on Tuesday and Thursday. Plus a drinking night on Thursday, sending off Michael who is going back to grad school.

Talk about not being able to get much sleep next week! Damn!

Oh, and a few well wishes to my friends out there who may or may not be reading. And if you guys aren’t busy, please send some good thoughts their ways as well.

Shane’s uncle, Pops’ brother passed away today. Condolences to the family.

Justin’s mom is still in the hospital but holding steady. Stop by Olaina’s blog to see updates and share some good thoughts.

And finally, ‘Mazing Amy is housebound per doctor’s order and bored out of her mind. Visit her over there and keep her entertained, would you?

P.S. 1 - The result of the poll plus my fielding out to friends is quite conclusive. Folks tell me to take a trip. Brandon + one friend told me to buy the guitar and live out my rock n roll fantasy. I’m starting to feel the urge to RAWK!

P.S. 2 - Supercalifragilisticexpialidoceous of the 21st century: 09f911029d74e35bd84156c5635688c0! (Say what?)

So I have saved some money I can spend on things for ME.

Should I…

A) Buy a plane ticket to Oregon and go see Cheech, my gay boyfriend, over Labor Day? After all, I have never really been to Oregon.

B) Buy myself a massage. And few other little things. Like knee-high platform combat boots. Other Emily the Strange things. Or just go raid Hot Topic for some work clothes.

C) Buy a new CAMERA phone. I want this one…but I don’t see any US carrier has these. You can buy it but which phone company do I use? (Anyone know?) I know, I know. People in Thailand are laughing at me. America is so behind times when it comes to phone it’s ridiculous!

D) Buy THIS electric guitar. (Oh, Gnarly Kitty is soooo going to scream!)  And a cheap amp. So I can pretend that I rock when really it’s a complete and total vanity purchase. Damn it, why can’t an acoustic guitars get to be this kick ass? (By the way, Rude Cactus, explain to me the difference between a guitar and a blem guitar?)

What do y’all think?

First there was Rove.

Then there was Bush.

Brandon is leaving for DC on Sunday.  I hope he doesn’t catch whatever White Boy Dance fever they have going on over there.