Tag: family

Nowhere and Everywhere

I posted a long time ago about the pain of being a Jane of All Trades. The trades I keep collecting have a collective weight that threaten to crush me.  Just take a look at the list.

Current Hobbies

Playing piano, guitar (need to do more of that) and singing. Cooking. Photography. Photography of stuff I cooked.  Blogging.  Tweeting.  USC Football fanatic.  Pop culture fiend. TV junkie.  Movie and entertainment news addict.  Supporting the troops with being an Operation Paperback volunteer and gathering funds to do my own Operation Jingle All the Way annually.  Thrill the World Los Angeles.

Developing Hobbies

Camping and backpacking. Speaking Italian. Making websites with Drupal.

Ex-Hobbies I wish I had more time to get back to

Making art. (I’m/was pretty good with collages and paper mache.) Scrapbooking aka paste stuff on paper, punch holes, put in binders. I still keep my keepsakes in a basket but haven’t put them in binders in years.

Ex-Developing Hobbies which I would pick up in a heartbeat if I have more time

Sewing. Designing t-shirts. Frisbee golf. Roller skates–this one is abandoned because no one would go with me. Playing video game.

Someday…

Making videos. Computer illustration–I really want to do designs like Threadless people.  Writing a memoir. Culinary school?

I asked my dad once when he would retire.  He said that he couldn’t possibly do that.  What would he do if he doesn’t work?  Dad’s hobby is being a news junky.  And shopping, but then he shops for clothes he’d wear to work.  He has no grand kids to raise (again, hinting at me on that one).  So, what would he do with the time?

And then there’s me with all of my hobbies I could barely keep up with.

I mean, if I win a lottery tomorrow, I am all set to retire and explore all of my interests.

Seriously, I love all of my hobbies so much I could be doing them all the time and not bitch about it.

Then again, Brandon did bring up a good point. Say, like cooking.  I do like to cook, but would I still like it if it becomes a career?  (Hey, P’ House – can you answer me that since you’re a chef?)  That was the reason why I’m still working full time and taking cooking classes on the side instead of being in a culinary school.

But now that I have so many interests and hobbies, the worlds are colliding.

For example, Brandon and I want to go camping on the weekend this summer, as in taking a Friday/Monday off to have 2 nights and 3 days excursion.  Or at least leave a little early on Friday and get 2 nights in somewhere.

How about this weekend? Nope. Got a tweet up on Friday.  Next?  Nope. Will be at DrupalCamp LA.  After that? Nope. Got a house party on Friday.  How about after that? Nope. Actually is double-booked for a barbecue on Saturday. Etc.

And next thing you know, September will be here, and I will start my Italian lessons on Saturday mornings. And of course, USC football. And then Thrill the World. And then the Big Gala I put on at work.

And with all the busy days and weekends, I am not in the kitchen as much as I would like to, nor am I playing the piano twice a week according to my goal.

Cut the television, someone suggest.  But how could I? It *is* another hobby of mine which I’m trying to consolidate into a few nights a week and Saturday/Sunday morning routine to maximize time usage.

It was also suggested that I wake up earlier on the weekends to get more hours in the day. The Winston Chruchill’s polyphasic sleep schedule sounds like a plan.  Unfortunately, my work would frown upon me napping for 2 hours in the middle of the afternoon.  Heh.

See what I mean about being nowhere AND everywhere?

If money grows on trees, that would be nice.  But I’d rather have a Time-Turner from Harry Potter books.

August Rush

I was putting the laundry in the washer yesterday, an automatic motion I usually don’t think about much any more.

Coins in.  Water runs for a few seconds.  Add soap. Let water run some more.  Add laundry.

A thought popped into my head.

“When was that first time you used the washing machine?”

I grew up in Thailand in a household full of service staff. In the 3-attached home complex, 3 families, each with its own maid, shared a cook,  a groundskeeper, a laundry lady, and a driver.

Pretty much everything has always been done for me.  The cooking. The cleaning. The laundry.

Until I came to the U.S. for high school, I have never used a washing machine before.  Sure, I have washed a few pieces of clothing before then at summer camps, but that was all by hand. Even when traveling abroad on my own, the adults were doing the laundry be it my chaperon to the international camp or the many host families I lived with.

Besides, with the maids doing all the work in Thailand, not a lot of people use washing machines back then.  It wasn’t like someone could teach me back home the way the cook showed me how to make basic Thai food. (Kicking myself now that I didn’t take interests in cooking back then. But that’s another post for another time.)

It was my aunt here in Garden Grove who taught me how to use the washer and dryer while I was staying with her during the transition into my high school host family’s home.

That was also where I learn the “water then soap then water” trick to not get clumpy detergent powder or concentrated amount of liquid detergent in your clothes.

A flashback so vivid it stopped me in my track.

How far I have come since 1993!

Next month, I would have been in America longer than I have been in Thailand.

Next month completes my 16th year in the U.S., then I’m on to 17th.  (Yeah, I just gave away my age. So?)

For that one moment in the laundry room, I did have half of my life flashed before my eyes.

I remembered my mom reading to me my fortune she got from a psychic back when I was in 7th or 8th grade.  It was predicted that I would study abroad like my brothers, but unlike them, I would live abroad and “leave [mom] behind”.

I laughed.  No way I would ever do that, I told her.

I stood my ground that I would be studying at Thammasat University, the anti-Chulalongkorn was where I wanted to be.  I would not be going abroad because that would be snooty and pretentious and I wasn’t about to leave my friends.  And even if I’d study abroad, I would come back here because my brain wasn’t going to drain out of my beloved motherland, and because I would never leave my mom.

Well, obviously the trend-bucking, anti-establishment, friends-loving, patriotic me died somewhere during my first visit to the U.S. in March 1993.

After 2 months of having tasted the freedom of American life, I didn’t quite want to go back.

Fortune teller was right about all of it.  I think my mom kind of knew after my summer in the U.K. in 1992 that this bird wouldn’t stay in the cage for long.

I wasn’t sure if she expected that I would really leave her behind.  I never thought I wouldn’t be there when she passed away.

So yes, I did leave her behind in that sense.

August 1993.

Everything changed then.

August used to be just another month with except for Thai Mother’s Day on the 12th, and meant the end of summer and beginning of school.

Now, August is the anniversary of my life in the U.S. and the anniversary of my mom’s passing.

16 and 2 years respectively.

What a journey so far.

Manic Friday

My brain refuses to shut off.

I am simultaneously working on plotting the route to the Port of Long Beach boat tour tomorrow, then what to take to the Long Beach Tweet Up potluck tomorrow night.

Then planning a baby shower for my coworker next Saturday.

Then updating my LinkedIn status and checking in on the long-abandoned MySpace.

Then connecting my family with my beloved cousin who hasn’t been back to Thailand from New Zealand in YEARS.

And I’m thinking about the Italian lessons I will be taking September and if I should start prepping for that with a dictionary or something.

I also wanted to play the piano but it’s way too late now.

Brandon has a sinus infection so bad his head hurt but he didn’t go see the doctor today on his day off. And his back has been bothering him. What is it with men and not seeing a doctor?

I am so tired I can’t think straight but my brains still want to think even if it’s all jumbled up.

Bad brain.

Time Warp

There she was, staring at me when I entered the room.  A vision of beauty in red.

Well, reddish brown.

A baby grand piano at my friend Tony’s house was calling my name the moment I stepped through the door.

I was at a potluck at a bus buddy’s house on Saturday.  Tony’s wife Irene is taking lessons now but she’s been practicing mostly on her little keyboard in the other room.  Their daughter who has moved away to the east coast used to play the piano.  So nobody has really played it for quite sometime.

I surprised everyone there when I sat down and started playing when were having dessert and coffee.

The baby grand sounded wonderful.  She felt wonderful.

For a moment, I was transported back to my playing piano when I was at home in Bangkok.  The evenings where I would sit down and played a medley of just about everything I knew.  All the Disney’s transitioned into Andrew Lloyd Weber transitioned into the standards and end with perhaps Hey Jude, Can’t Help Falling In Love, Somewhere in Time, or Desperado.

My mom would be nearby,  sitting in the dark in the living room or doing her “evening walk” around the house, humming to the tunes she knew.  My dad would pop in through the door from the office for dinner any time now.  He would either come over to watch, or go upstairs to wash up and pause at the mezzanine to watch for a while.

A little later on that evening at Tony’s, the host sat down in a chair to the right of the piano and watched me play.

Their daughter who played is no longer in the house.  The same way my parents have felt without me at home.

I have to say that at one point I thought I might have teared up a little bit.

It felt so familiar.

For a moment, I was home.

Motherless Day

“So what are you doing for Mother’s Day?” asked the perky medical assistant taking my vitals.

“Nothing,” I said.

“Nothing?”

“Well, if my mom hasn’t passed away, she’d be in Thailand so that’s kind of hard. Besides, Thai Mother’s Day is in August, so…”

“Oh my gosh. I’m so sorry.”

“That’s okay.”

It still feels a little funny telling some strangers that my mom has passed on. A lot of “where are your parents?” question when people find out I wasn’t from here. I usually go with “My dad and brothers are in Thailand still” and hope that THAT would be enough clue for people. But most people followed with, “What about your mom?”

She’s dead.

Oh my god. I’m so sorry.

No, no. That’s okay. Really, I have nothing else better to do than trying to make you feel better about a line you’ve just crossed. Seriously. It’s my fault for not having a living mother you can asked about. And it’s my fault for not telling you straight off.

Hi, I’m Oakley. I’m from Thailand. My husband’s white. My mom’s dead.

There. Is that better? Great.

It’s been over a year and I’m still not comfortable saying it out loud to people.

Does anyone ever get used to saying it?  Could one?

Phototastic Friday: Winning Geek

I have been submitting “Action Shots” to ThinkGeek.com for a while now.  C.H.I.M.P. Bunny here and Expendable there.

So when the final purchase of my shirt-tastic shopping spree came in (I mean, Rock – Paper – Scissors – Lizard – Spock!? How could you NOT buy?), it took all of 5 minutes for us to set up this shot Brandon took, and for me to submit with suggested caption of “You Spocking to me?”

you spocking to me?

Ladies and gentlemen, you are now looking at the winning portrait of  ThinkGeek.com’s Action Shot of April 2009.

It didn’t take ThinkGeek team long to approve the shot.  James was surprised when he was browsing ThinkGeek and found my picture a couple of days later.

“Am I hallucinating or is this you?” he emailed.

I’m sooo certifiably geeky.  AND proud of it!

My mom had always told me, according to all the fortune tellers, that I, like my dad, don’t have any “luck”.  As in, we won’t win the “enter to win” type stuff or the lottery.  Money won’t fall out of the sky or someone would give us anything out of the blue.  We have to earn our success, making our own luck.

So far, I earned a couple of them this year.  First was the Port of Long Beach photo contest which I was one of three winners–one other being Annette (@dananner).

POLB

And now this.

Mom and her army of fortune tellers was right. 🙂

*

P.S. For those of you oblivious to RPSLS, please edumacate yourselves.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_mKbnVKdix8]