Only in America

This morning at the Los Angeles Convention Center, in the South Hall, the gigantic banner announces, “Erotica LA”. Yes. The p*rn convention is back.

But people were coming OUT of the building, not going in. Odd. But then I saw more people crossing the streets, heading for the West Hall.

A big crowd had gathered in the courtyard outside the West Hall. The electronic sign in the corner blinked:

“Welcome New Citizens. US Naturalization Ceremony. West Hall.”

God bless America.


On the other hand, yesterday on Kevin & Bean morning show on KROQ, my beloved Psycho Mike spoofed “Hey there Delilah” as “Hey there Vagina”. Much hilarity.

Here’s the lyric:

Hey there Vagina,
You’re a fragrant little kitty
With your landing strip and camel toe
To me you look so pretty,
Yes you do
You know what I just want to do
It’s PUNISH you

Hey there Vagina,
You’re a fancy little beaver
Let my penis play the quarterback
And you can be receiver
Yes its true
I’ll throw a touchdown inside you
Yes its true

Ooooh It’s what (twat’s) you do to me
Ooooh It’s what you do to me
Ooooh It’s what you do to me
Oh you little penis sleeve

I love you little heart-shaped box
A pair of lips that never talks
It’s everything a man could ever want
The only problem in the world
Is you’re connected to a girl
And That makes you annoying in the end
In the end

Hey there Vagina,
You’re a man’s reason for living
You can make the most frugal gentleman
Become quite giving
Yes its true
You sausage wallet
I love you.

But then, their lawyers pulled the plug on the song. TMZ quickly reported the travesty and inviting us all to judge for ourselves.

ETA: Here’s the link to both versions of “Hey There Vagina,” the original flavor and the updated version as a response to the ban titled “Hey There How are ya?”


  1. Chris Cactus   •  

    You’re right – only in America. BUt who in their right minds would LEAVE a porn convention?

  2. kitty   •  

    Haha Porn Convention. Here, we don’t need a convention haha

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