My friend Gregg (@fstop23) died last week after a battle with cancer.
Since his diagnosis in October, he had put up a great fight. But cancer, being a cheating, murderous mother fucker that it is, got the upper hand mid-March.
His death completed the “it comes in three” circle for me personally. (Remember 2 former coworkers from earlier this year?)
Folks have been writing wonderful things about Gregg and how his life and death impact them.
I wrote about three drafts of this tribute/story about Gregg now and I couldn’t publish any of them. His death reminded me of my own mother’s. It’s not fair to him or to anyone else to talk about how I feel and how I’m dealing with it.
But one thing I can share with you and I can share it well.
I’m angry at the unfairness of it all.
Why Gregg? Why now? Why rare cancer? Why did he has to suffer so much and so long? Why wasn’t he to one to beat this thing? I mean, the man was one in a million as a human being, why can’t you give him that one in a million chance to beat cancer too? Instead, you have to give him that rare disease nobody knows what to do with.
I know I was cooing about how awesomely God/Universe/Karma/Fate/Circumstances has lined things up for me. But did It have to take Gregg as a payment for this cosmic alignment? Or is this just another way of the Universe to teach me to fly into a brand new world through an emotional turbulence?
Universe deals out tough love, I guess. I can’t blame It for that.
But I for damn sure will blame cancer.
It has taken two of the people in my world now and gotten on my bad side.
The man who would have been here to mentor my professional leap of faith is gone.
The friend who’d swoop in to go do those things I like to do that Brandon doesn’t necessary want to do–like watching Avatar the second time but in 3D IMAX–is gone.
The kind of friend who took pity on this Carole King fan and took me to the James Taylor/Carole King concert at the Hollywood Bowl is gone.
The guy who would show up to watch USC game with me even though he couldn’t care less about college football. The twitter buddy. The photography partner. The gracious party host. The Yoda of technology and innovation. The best of a friend anyone can have.
All of that. All of Gregg.
Fuck you very much, cancer.