Updated: February 2016
The Proust Questionnaire
aka the Vanity Fair questionnaire
1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Sitting out in a sunny front porch somewhere with wide open space, some quiet countryside, with good friends and family, a table full of great foods and wine.
2. What is your greatest fear?
Dying with things left unsaid…which happened when my mother passed away.
3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
I’m horribly gifted with procrastination.
4. What is the trait you most deplore in others?
Pretension. I hate fake people.
5. Which living person do you most admire?
Those who have given up a traditional “day job” to pursue a dream AND make a living doing it.
6. What is your greatest extravagance?
Not looking at the prices on the menu on my rare visit to any fine dining establishment.
7. What is your current state of mind?
Frustrated. I want to find the right work/life balance.
8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
Sobriety. I think we’ll all be better off a little bit alcoholized all the time. Don’t you?
9. On what occasion do you lie?
When the truth will hurt.
10. What do you most dislike about your appearance?
My muscular calves. Short legs with beefy calves make me look even shorter. Oh well, c’est la vie.
11. Which living person do you most despise?
People who throw their money away at frivolous things when you can use that money to do something better.
12. What is the quality you most like in a man?
13. What is the quality you most like in a woman?
14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?
Music, Brandon, and my Snoopy doll.
16. When and where were you happiest?
Drinking sake and eating Japanese food with my dad, my two cousins and their boyfriends and Brandon in Auckland. It was so good to reconnect with family and spend time with my dad.
17. Which talent would you most like to have?
Circa 1990 Whitney Houston’s vocal prowess.
18. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
I’d very much like to have 20/20 vision and healthy eyeballs with no chronic dryness.
19. What do you consider your greatest achievement?
Having held everything together–my marriage, my sanity, our finance–during the two years of not having a full-time employment.
20. If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?
A cat. I would like to have a fluffy, wag-able tail.
21. Where would you most like to live?
Out of my suitcase in hotel rooms while I travel around the world for pleasure after having won the lottery.
22. What is your most treasured possession?
My mom’s wind-up watch. It was my dad’s first gift to her.
23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
When one loses all hopes.
24. What is your favorite occupation?
Organizing people online and off-line. I do pretty well running an event.
25. What is your most marked characteristic?
26. What do you most value in your friends?
27. Who are your favorite writers?
This is going to be embarrassing little list. I have just recently come to appreciate Stephen King. I’ve been following Jim Butchers’ The Dresden Files series for years so I guess he’d be my favorite too. I’m also learning to really like the dark places where Alan Moore’s brain lives.
28. Who is your hero of fiction?
Batman. Money doesn’t matter, but protecting people and fighting for justice does.
29. Which historical figure do you most identify with?
Annie Oakley? LOL I’m kidding. I can’t think of anyone.
30. Who are your heroes in real life?
31. What are your favorite names?
Leila. Aeryn. Kaylee. Austin. Nathan. Daniel.
32. What is it that you most dislike?
33. What is your greatest regret?
Not having been home with my mother when she passed away.
34. How would you like to die?
Don’t care as long as it’s after #1.
35. What is your motto?
It’s not all about you. It’s never about you. It’s about ALL of us.
In the Actor’s Studio with James Lipton’s Ten Questions
1. What is your favorite word?
Hoist and buoy. These two words make me giggle.
2. What is your least favorite word?
3. What turns you on?
Wit and humor.
4. What turns you off?
5. What is your favorite curse word?
Fuck a duck.
6. What sound or noise do you love?
Little nuances of musical instrument: a breathy puff right before a saxophone note, metallic swishes of finger sliding over guitar strings, thuds of piano hammers on the strings when you lean over an open grand piano. Also love the sound of rain, of dogs running on hardwood floor, and of bacon or steak sizzling in a hot pan.
7. What sound or noise do you hate?
Repeating mechanical banging/clanging and other loud, obnoxious noises. i.e. jackhammer, leaf blower, and gun shots. It sucks that I like firearms but I HATE the noise.
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
Rock front man.
9. What profession would you not like to attempt?
Politics or lawyering.
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
Nirvana is a few clouds over but you’re welcome to hang out here too.