Mine that is.
Last night’s “Be as tired as possible so I’d sleep through the night” strategy did not work. I woke up with a start around 1:58 a.m. thinking that it WAS indeed morning and that somehow there was a power outage that set my clock back to 2 a.m. I could NOT possibly be waking up at 2 a.m. after 3 days of about 3 hours of sleep per night!?!?
But I did wake up at 2 a.m. and spent the next 3.5 hours tossing and turning and, okay I admit it, laying around somewhat paranoid.
Why is it 2 a.m.? It should be 5 a.m. The birds are chirping! I’d better get up and check other clocks. Wait. I thought I had closed the closet when I went to bed, but why is the closet door open now? Who opened the closet? Is there an intruder? If there is, I’m not going to get up and get killed. I wonder if Cujo is in the closet. Why is the bed trembling? Is it Brandon? No. Is that an earthquake? Oh my god! I hope it doesn’t get too violent. I don’t want that spirit arrow to fall from the ceiling and hit me in the skull. Oh sheesh. THAT could actually happen, couldn’t it? I’m staring stright right at the arrowhead. Is it really 2 a.m.? Why is it not 5 a.m.!? Why isn’t my de-jetlag strategy working?!?
On and on with thoughts and intermittent sleep all the way until the alarm went off at 5:30 a.m.
When I don’t get enough sleep, either having been up all night or woken up before I got enough rest, I get nauseated. The less sleep I get, the more nauseous I feel.
This morning, I left the house feeling like I was going to throw up. I couldn’t even sleep on the bus as much as I tried, but having my eyes closed seem to help keeping the dizziness down. All the way through the first half of the day. I couldn’t concentrate as I was suppressing the urge to puke. I can’t fully function at this rate.
Brandon said I should stay awake by staying at work or else I won’t sleep again tonight. But I’ve tried that for the past 3 nights and it ain’t working. At about 3 hours a night, that’s not enough sleep for me. My body needs sleep. Period. Tonight, I will require some help from Tylenol PM and a bottle of New Castle.
I finished what was urgently needed for the day and went home around 1:30. The train barely passed Staples Center and I started to nod off. I woke up in Compton, in time to call Shane to come pick me up, and managed to stay awake the rest of the way. (It was very nice of him to drive me today, by the way!) When I got home at almost 3 p.m., I settled in and the next thing I know, Brandon was waking me up at 5 p.m.
I woke up groggy but forced myself to run errands with Brandon, and made dinner. I am still sleepy right now, so I hope this is enough.
Dear Buddha, please help me sleep through the night tonight. I don’t have any more sick hours left!
Sidenote: Please also welcome yet another addition to my blogroll, KorBua of the Kinda Daily Peninguin. KorBua is another young voice of Thailand, a friend of Gnarly Kitty. She’s been by here a lot so I think it’s time she gets her place on my blog as well. Welcome!