Heaven’s Sakes

In our circle of friends and family, we all know Brandon is the anti-Christ. Like you can’t tell already from the previous entry.

Here goes another brilliant religious point to ponder.

In my sect of Buddhism, the Theravada, only men can achieve nirvana because only men could become monks.

“So yeah, that’s why I’m a non-practicing Buddhist. I don’t think it’s fair that I can’t achieve nirvana because I don’t have a penis,” I said.

“Feh! You can buy one nowaday,” Brandon proclaimed.

“Now when you get to the afterlife and they tell you can’t enter the higher level of heaven because you’re a female, you can say ‘well yeah? I do so have a penis.’ Then you whip it out and wave it at them. ‘There! I bet yours can’t do this ‘ Bzzzzzzzzz.”

I was crying now at this point from laughing so hard.

” ‘And mine glows in the dark too. So, for Christ’s sakes, let me in already.’ ”

Yes. Brandon is the anti-Christ. And an equal opportunity offender.

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