Crash Test Oakley

I’m not safe on a bike. Never have been.

But I insist on getting on the thing so I can spend time with Brandon.  Not to mention that it’s fun.

Y’all remember my little blue Townie?

Townie fully loaded

After the stunts I pulled yesterday, I now have a name for the bike.


You’ll see why here in a bit.

Feeling ambitious on Sunday, I proposed that we rode from our place to the Alamitos Bay Farmers’ Market in Long Beach so I can pick up some fresh veggies.  After all, Brandon hooked up my cargo department so my little bucket won’t come flying off like it had before.  This would be the perfect time to go play!

And so we did.

On our way there, we rode down Los Alamitos/Seal Beach Boulevard over the 405 freeway and down Westminster/2nd Street.  I did pretty well all things considered with a few stops to rest my tired legs.  We got to the market in one piece.

Oh, the market.  The. Market!  I *LOVE* farmers’ market.  So much good stuff.

Thank GOD we had a limit of buying only what I could carry in the bucket. Well, Brandon did help carry a few other things. Like a satchel of lavendar. And our $10 a pound ground bison.  Yes, bison. Tatanka. Bison.

Farmers market loot on back of my cruiser.

We then rode to Seal Beach for some Z Pizza.  And then it was time to head back.

With my haul, Brandon suggested that we rode back on the San Gabriel river bike path for easier terrain.

However, we underestimated the extra weight on the back of my bike going through all of those underpasses.

Coming down one of them, my cruiser hit a patch and it wobbled. Hard.

I was *this* close to losing control and spill.

Not that a beach cruiser is know for its agility to begin with, the extra weight also contributed to a few more near-disasters I had all the way home because I couldn’t stop fast enough.

A sudden stop coming back from the trail onto Katella resulted in the peddles hitting me (and left a bruise) on my calf.

A sharper turn back down our street, I was caught between “going to fast in a turn and I would totally crash” and “not slow enough, oh my god I’m going to launch off the sidewalk!”  With enough time to strategize how I was going to crash, I slammed the bike into the metal sign post: wheel to the left, handle to the right, and my right hand wayyyy out of the crash zone.

With all these odd maneuvering, y’all, I am sore in places I didn’t know existed.

However, I must admit…

It was hella fun.


  1. Brandon   •  

    And she gets mad at me when I demand she ride in front of me so I can see what she’s doing. I have to turn around ever 5 seconds to see if she’s crashed into something.

    There’s a reason I drive us everywhere.

    She cooks, I drive.

  2. Traci   •  

    I’m wondering if it would help to ride a bike that isn’t 5x as heavy as you are?

    Or maybe a tricycle? hehehe

  3. oakmonster   •  

    If it’s not a leisure peddle down the street, I’m pretty horrible. It comes down to my lack of confidence on a bike. Being afraid all the time lending itself to being indecisive. Lots of problems there.

    I’m sure once I get a hold of it, I should be a lot safer rider no matter on what bike. 🙂

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